Emptyness

Working to achieve it but never getting near.. it keeps on trippin and flippin on you.. your so close your tryn to feel it but no way its gonna let you take it.. time after time you clear up your mind and go in with all your powers and desires.. it lets you through it lets you take your steps but you only get as far as seeing it.. its your dream its where your smile awaits. but youll never take it im a survivor no1 can deny that, a hero of my own ill always say that.. crawled out of a grave i keep on regretting that cuz since i did i was introduced to this whole new life you see.. where you work and fight to be and watch 'life' wreck it on the spot while your half asleep. why did i have to face that why me.. this isnt how its supposed to be.. posing a smile and sending joy but deep within me im just a broken toy. no story or a purpose in this planet to serve, ran around the globe found hundred hearts of gold but none were mine to hold. on a daily basis i lose them battles with life.. ive got a tear tryn to escape an eye and fake a smile with lots of pain inside.. people all around seem to be doing fine life doesnt seem to mind.. how much more ? when will it stop ? i lost it all.. broken and torn inside out. a lost soul an empty mind and a broken heart thumping cause it doesnt know how to stop. i pray for it to change.. please my life is no game.. i lost them happiest years they say and i nod like it doesnt matter as if theyre gonna come again.. if only my blood had a say, oh man it would say the scariest things.. under that flesh i feel that flow of rage. it wont stop not until it sees a change.. cuz man i tried givin life an excuse i tried to find a reason but even the closest people arent able to feel it and i cant even bare im like a volcano thats holding its deadliest eruption, like a suicide bomber wanting to push that trigger. my levels of hope are drained out, can you change that? i give in.. i dont wanna face it.. paralyse me break me take my breathes i dont mind even death.. just make that pain go away im trapped in my own life.. im unable to run from me im dead but im living cuz life is enjoy playing tricks on me.. a lab rat nothing more nothing less.. feeding me that poison all day then givin me a moment to see bright light.. ive seen enough of my dreams get shattered away.. i cant even share that kind of pain. all i ask is to disconnect me from this life.. end me in peace.. take me away quietly please. i beg of you :( please

For the future..

After that long day.. that long life.. when your body stops running and all that power and energy from within starts rushin through ur brain and ur brain keeps on taking and taking with no breaks it starves for more crys for attention and nothn can stop this once it goes so far....
At that point.. at that point you click and understand, analyse and generate that life of yours.. but that silence got you tied up!! You keep it within you.. hidin it in the heart of your soul !! Pushin it all around and the brain wouldnt stop juggling with it but ur still not taking it out ur still not setting ur self free !
Your trapped ! Trapped inside of that world inyour head ! I can see you screaming for help but none is willing to bend and listen..  that little you inside your head is getting ripped from both ends !
You exlpode you burst when ur all alone tucked in bed with those thoughts runnin through ur head! Praying for this part of the night to end ! Is this me ? Why am I so bent? Im a tough one I can comprehend.. take those few steps and look at the mirror.. do u like what you see ? Is this what you wanna be !? Wash them tears away and look so bright ! I know them tears werent so light... life is winning and things arent the same.. but as time passes youll pick yourself up and remember those days when u shed those tears away.. in many pointless ways.. your bigger than what you think you are a survivor in the crowds !!

Let this day by.. it wont hurt us if we smile.. and guess what? Il be here everysingle time ! 
So I give you this humble post tonight !

Just smile ;*

For the future..

After that long day.. that long life.. when your body stops running and all that power and energy from within starts rushin through ur brain and ur brain keeps on taking and taking with no breaks it starves for more crys for attention and nothn can stop this once it goes so far....
At that point.. at that point you click and understand, analyse and generate that life of yours.. but that silence got you tied up!! You keep it within you.. hidin it in the heart of your soul !! Pushin it all around and the brain wouldnt stop juggling with it but ur still not taking it out ur still not setting ur self free !
Your trapped ! Trapped inside of that world inyour head ! I can see you screaming for help but none is willing to bend and listen..  that little you inside your head is getting ripped from both ends !
You exlpode you burst when ur all alone tucked in bed with those thoughts runnin through ur head! Praying for this part of the night to end ! Is this me ? Why am I so bent? Im a tough one I can comprehend.. take those few steps and look at the mirror.. do u like what you see ? Is this what you wanna be !? Wash them tears away and look so bright ! I know them tears werent so light... life is winning and things arent the same.. but as time passes youll pick yourself up and remember those days when u shed those tears away.. in many pointless ways.. your bigger than what you think you are a survivor in the crowds !!

Let this day by.. it wont hurt us if we smile.. and guess what? Il be here everysingle time ! 
So I give you this humble post tonight !

Just smile ;*